:::Let The Great Experiment Begin!:::

I always swore that I'd never get myself ready for a formal event. Too stressful. I always swore that instead I'd pay beauticians, aestheticians, magicians, to do there thing and make me presentable. Oh well.

Tomorrow is my big work party. I had to start my preparations tonight since I'm trying to keep the related primping costs down by doing everything myself. I did splurge and get my face waxed (it only cost me $30! Wahoo!), but that's really a general life necessity so we're not going to count that.

The thing is, I don't do formal. I like the way I that look without makeup, so I prefer to spend most of my existence at or very near that state of being. But, needs must.

I spent a few painful hours at the mall last night trying to buy new underpinnings (a total bust [punny!]), and some new makeup (semi-bust) based on an inspiration picture I found on le internets. It's been a while since I vamped myself up, so we'll see how that goes. I'm not adventurous makeup wise, but I know what looks good on me and I trust myself so it shouldn't be too bad.

Nevertheless, this is how I feel tonight at the prospect of all the primping ahead of me...


So much to do in such a short amount of time.


My dismay is quickly turning into fear and panic.


Step 1: Prepare hair for flat ironing in the morning.


I have no idea why my teeth look so yellow. My teeth are not yellow.

Step 2: Give self a vigorous foot de-roughing.


I put too much bubble bath in the tub so it started overflowing with suds once I turned it on. I had to pull my trash can over and start bailing out bubbles in order to avert a disaster.


It got out of hand for a while there.

I lost my stamina at the end of my foot adventure, so I'll be doing to nail filling and painting tomorrow. That also leaves for tomorrow...

Shaving
Flat ironing my hair
Giving myself a manicure
Biore-stripping my nose
Packing my bag for the hotel (I'm staying the night!)
Curling my hair
Rolling my hair
Shimmering/Bronzing my legs
Putting on makeup
Styling hair


Mama.

I think I might just spend the entire night in my room and not go to the party at all.

:::spt: new things:::

' i resolve to take more self-portraits while trying new things'

my new thing? well, today i saw a new president inaugurated. today i stood witness as a new page was written in the history books. i was far, far away on judea's plains, but i was there.

here are my best shots of the jumbo-tron near me...

{president-elect obama walking out to the swearing in area}

{VICE PRESIDENT biden being sworn in}

{PRESIDENT obama inspiring the crowd and the nation}

and now i need to go de-thaw.

:::the day before inauguration:::

{this was initially going to be my spt post, but i wrote a new post after the inauguration}

yesterday i ventured out to take some photos of the inaugural sites.

now, i realize there are much, much better photos of these locals on the internet, but sometimes i think that professional photos are too perfect to convey the sense of realness that you would feel if you were there for yourself. rejoice in the point-and-shoot!

before we start, here are some things to ignore:

1. the total lack of makeup.
2. the smurf like hat sitting on top of my head.
3. my gigante cheeks. i like to think they're filled with hope, not fat.

and now we begin.

{the swearing in site -- the mall side of the capitol, technically the back side, which faces west.}

{ticketed seated seating. the rest of the millions get to stand.}

{you can see the corner of one of the jumbo-trons on the right side of this photo. i think there are going to be at least twenty of them on the mall, stretching all the way back to the tidal basin.}

from the capitol i walked down pennsylvania, which is the parade route, to the white house. it's like 2 miles, people. i walked two miles in the cold to get these photos for you.

{on pennsylvania at the white house near the end of the parade route.}

{still at the white house.}

{the bullet-proof viewing stand directly in front of the white house on penn. one of my life goals is to become so important that i have to be ensconced in bullet-proof glass.}

{now i'm standing directly north of the white house in lafayette square. can you see it in the background?}

{one more in lafayette square, and a shot of the other viewing stand across from the bullet-proof stand on penn. the people sitting there aren't important enough to be behind security glass. ha! schmucks...}

{across the street from lafayette park is the hay-adams, where the obamas had to stay for a short time because the blair house was 'full'. sure, georgie...}

{leaving the white house, walking to the metro on k street. do you check yourself out in windows?}

{metro may welcome the visitors, but rebekah says, 'go home, i want my city back, but thanks for your tax dollars.'}

{union station is the metro stop near my house. as i was coming home yesterday they were setting up for an event so i stopped to take pictures. aren't the linens and place settings wonderful?}

{turns out there was a dinner there last night honoring biden that was attended by the obamas. i bet the hot dog king from the food court catered it. that evening i could hear the motorcade sirens from my house, and there were some aircraft above as well. }

{really, i love these tables. i took quite a few pictures of them, much to the amusement of the catering staff.}

so, there you go. it's now 7:56 am. there are planes and helicopters going over my house like crazy, with the sound of their engines occasionally punctuated by sirens from the streets. i'm going to go take a shower, get dressed, grab every government id that i have, and start walking outside to see how close i can get to the mall. could be interesting, but more than likely i'll have a panic attack as soon as i see the crowds as turn back around.

the king is dead! long live the king!
{please follow this hyperlink so that you'll understand that i'm not a terrorist.}

:::let's pretend it isn't happening:::

i am not going to any inaugural events. sorry. i like pomp and circumstance, but this is all way too crazy for me.

but let me say this, i guarantee you, absolutely, that there isn't a person in the world who lives closer to the inaugural site than myself and my neighbors on my street. i could literally stand outside my building and hear the ceremony. i'm never in the right place at the right time. feels kinda neat, even if it is giving me a panic attack. the stories about the security measures in place are adding more and more stress to my already beleaguered mind. i don't want to get sniped. i've got no food supply. if something goes down next week, if i meet my end next tuesday...


remeber, loved ones, scott gets everything.

edited to add: ok, there are some residents near the capitol south metro stop who could beat me out by a measly block, but i'm still closer than close.